The Most Harmful Things To Men’s Potential Aren’t Weed, Alcohol Or Video Games

It’s this one thing that is sucking your life force. Here it is and how to protect yourself.

Toxic relationships are the greatest enemy of your potential. And it’s your fault.

It’s your fault: You’re allowing this toxicity into your life. And I’ve been there…

I spent years passing blame. Blaming others for sucking away my life force.

But I could have asserted my boundaries and walked away any time. I was blinded by lust and lacked respect for myself—receiving this same lack of respect…

Give yourself grace. It is the natural tendency of the feminine to test your word.

You failed.

Related: Simping vs Flirting

Here’s How You’re Going to Change That

1. Never Change Your Mind To Please Her

If you do this, you betray your own deepest knowledge. And the worst thing? You are losing her respect.

If she asks you how does she look in a dress, and you don’t like it—tell her. She will adore you for your honesty.

2. Understand Polarity

Polarity is the spark between two opposing energies—masculine and feminine.

Gender does not determine which role you take, but as one partner falls into their masculine energy, the other falls into their feminine.

The problems arise with depolarisation…

Partners may adopt traits they don’t naturally suit, causing withdrawals of attraction.

Modern media also push women into their masculine (through work) and men into their feminine (increasingly emotional).

The closer they become, the more depolarisation occurs.

3. Lead The Way

Allow her to relax into her feminine by being assertive in your decisions, whilst always confiding in her for input.

She wants direction:

• Plan the date

• Organise everything

• Create a safe environment for her

Watch her turn into a marshmallow.

Related: How to Overcome Fragile Masculinity

4. Mission Is The Priority Of Masculine

Your purpose must come before your relationship. In this state, you give your best to that relationship.

Comfort is the enemy here: It is the feminine’s tendency to relax, this is not your place.

Stay on your shit.

5. She Doesn’t Want To Be Your Priority

She might not say it. But what she truly wants is: A man dedicated to his purpose, emotionally available for the relationship.

She’ll never admit it, but…

She wants you to be willing to sacrifice the relationship for your highest purpose.

6. She Will Test You

Women will subconsciously test to see if you are the man you claim to be. Example: Withholding sexual intimacy.

You must earn her trust and respect before she lets you in. You also must possess the charisma to open that door in the first place.

7. Want Her To Test You

Do you want her to settle for some bozo? Invite her to test your character. Accept this challenge to become your highest self.

Find attraction in the standards she sets for herself.

8. Be Rock Solid

Your success is meaningless to her if you are brittle. She wants to know you’re unbreakable.

And you will most likely break when you expect her validity.

Even if you just made a million dollars, you are a weak man if you require her validation.

Related: Things Women Do to Emasculate Men

9. Enforce Boundaries

Allowing her to leak toxicity into your life is your fault because you didn’t set boundaries. (Or stick to them)

Have a conversation. Tell her how you operate. If she doesn’t agree or stick to this bond, you can always leave.

Do this early in a relationship or forever be disrespected.

10. Lean Into Her Chaos

Don’t try to diminish the chaos that comes with the feminine. The truth is—it never ends. See her changes in mood as a challenge or an amusement.

Don’t analyse it. Not all her problems have a cause. She may just feel unloved. Give her your love.

Nothing motivates a man like the right woman. The woman you pick plays a big role in your success. Choose wisely.

Because having the right one by your side will have the biggest ROI in your life and career.


The most harmful things to men’s potential are not the commonly blamed vices of weed, alcohol, or video games.

Rather, it is the toxicity that comes with most relationships where a man is drained because he does not play by the unspoken rules of masculinity.

If you allow yourself to be overwhelmed by feminine energy, you will be consumed by emotional fragility and the desire to please your woman.

It’s not their fault, but your inability to understand how this masculine-feminine terrain works.

With this guide, you can be able to wade off the most harmful things to men’s potential.

This text is culled from the handle of Ben Smith @bensmithlive on X.